EULOGY FOR PAPA RAMON ESTRADA STA. CLARA
10 October 2021
Good evening, everyone! On behalf of my siblings, we thank everyone for taking time to pay their last respect for Papa and to condole with us.
Let me present a brief background on Papa. Ramon Estrada Sta. Clara (aka Lazatin) was born on 26 July 1948, son of Renato Lazatin (aka Sta. Clara) and Perla Estrada. He was the eldest son among the brood of 7 (Ramon, Rogelio, Rene, Rebecca, Ruby, Rosemarie, and Rowena). (yes, all Rs). Papa grew up with his Lolo and Lola – Dr. Mariano Lazatin and Margarita de Asis Lazatin. He studied Kindergarten at San Sebastian Manila, Grades 1-3 at San Beda, Grades 4-7 at Letran and high school at Mapua. He took Accounting as his college course in Mapua. I didn’t inherit his numbers acumen, but I think Monching has that.
Papa met Mama (Asenette Pontillas Dichoson) at his grandfather’s hospital – Mercy Hospital in Pasay. Mama was working as a nurse in the said hospital. Sparks flew and they got married on 18 December 1968. Papa worked in the construction sector. He was a Project Manager. He also became a business consultant to many of his friends. Papa was not just good with numbers, but he was good with words. He had written most of the feasibility studies of his friends’ business concepts. He was also the designated speechwriter of his friends. He later ventured on his own business – Itik/poultry. But his two mild strokes greatly affected him.
Let me describe our Papa to everyone or how I knew him to be. Papa was a good eldest son. He was the patriarch of the Sta. Clara clan when our grandfather died. He took care of his brood. He mended the rifts/tampuhan of family members. He was kind and generous. He often teased the people he love and care about. My aunts can attest to this. Papa may look tough, but he was a softie when it comes to family. My Papa was a devoted husband to my Mama. More than 4 decades of marriage to our Mama Asenette. He was a good provider. He sent us 5 kids to top schools. We had food, clothing on our backs and roof over our head. He was a strict father to us, but a super spoiler to his grandkids on their birthdays, Christmas and whenever they would excel in school.
As time passed by, Papa’s faith in God was renewed and strengthened. He devoted his life in the service of Catholic Church. He was a Lay Minister. In September 2009, Archbishop of Manila, Cardinal Rosales, gave him an award for his committed and dedicated services as Lay Liturgical Minister of the Sto. Niño de Pandacan Parish.
This is the gist of Papa’s life story. But I wanted to tell you what I’ve really learned from my father.
There 4 key lessons that Papa taught me and my siblings:
Nurture your faith – When we were just young kids, on Sundays, Papa would always quiz us on the gospel and homily. He would always encouraged us to read the bible and meditate on verses. He would motivate us to attend recollections/retreats. He said that when adversities come, we would not be disheartened or troubled. Faith will pull us through.
Family is everything – Friends may come and go, but family will always be there for you. Growing up, our Sundays were sacred. It was reserved for family time – attending mass together and reconnecting through meals or doing hobbies together. After mass, Papa would often treat us to lunch out, or just window shop or just play around in the CCP Complex. Holidays and reunions were important for Papa. It was a way of catching up with relatives and making unforgettable memories for the family. I’m sure that my cousins remember these special reunions, outings, and Christmas parties.
Manners maketh man – For Papa, a person is not defined by birth, property, or money, but by how he/she behaves towards others. Papa said this before, “aanhin moa ng titulo o yaman kung hinde ka marunong makipagkapwa tao.” He instilled these 4 traits in us:
HONOR – Honor your word. He believed that one should honor his word. Panindigan moa ng sinabi mo. If you don’t honor your word, you’ll lose trust and credibility.
EDUCATE – Educate yourself continuously. Education is not just the degree. Educate yourself on what’s happening around you. During our childhood, Papa would often drill us on current events. It was required for us to read newspapers, listen to news on radio and watch news on TV. He would want us to open our eyes on realities of life.
RESPECT – Respect other people’s time. It is a subtle way of showing respect for others. Papa taught us to be punctual always. We carry this trait up to this day.
DISCIPLINED – If you want to achieve something, put in the work. He always told us to do things right the first time. Papa, seriously Strat Management/HR Manager ka talaga? You have to give your best in everything, no matter how small you think your part is.
SHARE – He said this many times to us – to always share what you have. He was generous with his blessings and time.
Expression of love – My idea of love came from Papa. I’ve witnessed how Papa treated Mama. He adored her like his queen. Even in their 60s/senior years, they were a sweet couple. They would do slow dance, hug, and kiss in front of their kids and grandchildren. They did things together always. They always held hands while walking. They are not the type of couple who would let one spouse walk ahead or fall behind. I told Nelson, my husband, that this is what I would us to be – still affectionate in our wrinkle and gray selves.
Papa expressed his love for us through food. Papa was way ahead of his time. He was a genuine foodie. He was a true blue Kapampangan. He would bring us to different and new restaurants from stalls along estero of Ongpin to fine dining hotel restaurants. He did not scrimp money on food. He brought us there for experience and making memories together. He trained our taste buds. We discovered the taste of foie gras, caviar, fried frog legs, grilled bayawak and tapang usa.
Papa has shown his love through service. When I got married, Papa checked our apartment on our first day of residence there. He found out that the water pump was not working properly and brought in a handyman to fix it and our other faucets. He made everything comfortable and set for our stay.
Papa was not afraid to show his affection. I remember his lambing to his children – was to rub noses. When Papa had his stroke, he said “I love you” regularly. He showered his grandkids with lots of kisses and hugs. He held hands with Mama until the day she died.
Even if Papa was a busy man, he would always allot time for us. Like I’ve stated earlier, Sunday is a family day. Time is precious. It is something that you can’t take back. He reserved time to celebrate the big and small things in our family whether by eating out or just having a special meal at home.
Lastly, for Papa, love is sharing. Sharing what you have, not just material stuff, but also your time, energy, focus and your whole self. Share what you love or want the most. In our family, we all love the Bangus Belly – nag-uunahan kami kumuha nyan. If he saw that one got a tiny portion of the belly, he would give half of his portion. (It was always Mama who got the tiniest portion). He emphasized this so many times – “Give what you love, not just your scraps.” Give the best to the one you love.
I take all of these things in my heart. Good bye, Papa! You will always live on in my heart. I love you.
